Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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