ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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