Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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