You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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