You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize