dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
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