its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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