dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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