we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize