shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
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Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
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Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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