Who wears a wallet chain?!
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
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