how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize