she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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