We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
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he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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