There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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