i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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