Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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