WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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