Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize