Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
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I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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