yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
love makes seman taste better
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Randomize