i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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