Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize