so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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