I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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