who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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