Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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