sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize