When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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