i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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