It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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