someone threw a dead crab at me
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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