Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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