My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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