I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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