I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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