just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize