I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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