Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
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Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
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This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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