I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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