I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
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We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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