I seem to have left my pride at pride
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize