the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
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Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
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I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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