ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize