Im at strip club and am horny
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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