It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize