Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms

(712): View more from Iowa

Oh God

(515): View more from Iowa

I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship

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(515): Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms (712): Oh God (515): I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship http://tfl.nu/mj00

Replies (31) Good night (1083) Bad night (1964)
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(404): View more from Georgia

What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?

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(404): What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you? http://tfl.nu/4jb3

Replies (22) Good night (9260) Bad night (6111) Order T-Shirt
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(631): View more from New York

sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood

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(631): sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood http://tfl.nu/dhuu

Replies (113) Good night (947) Bad night (6152) Order T-Shirt
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(212): View more from New York

lets start a swedish sibling band together

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(212): lets start a swedish sibling band together http://tfl.nu/bq14

Replies (21) Good night (3164) Bad night (720) Order T-Shirt
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(256): View more from Alabama

i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.

(1-256): View more from Alabama

dude how high are you right now?

(256): View more from Alabama

do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.

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(256): i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground. (1-256): dude how high are you right now? (256): do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves. http://tfl.nu/7ihc

Replies (40) Good night (11522) Bad night (1105)
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(302): View more from Delaware

when are you leaving homes?

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51

(302): View more from Delaware

I had a sex dream about Oprah.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

go back to sleep

(302): View more from Delaware

dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.

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(302): when are you leaving homes? (610): it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51 (302): I had a sex dream about Oprah. (610): go back to sleep (302): dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah. http://tfl.nu/idf1

Replies (16) Good night (1252) Bad night (5174)
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(630): View more from Illinois

whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.

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(630): whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch. http://tfl.nu/lo8i

Replies (5) Good night (2204) Bad night (1104) Order T-Shirt
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.

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(608): I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus. http://tfl.nu/i1nm

Replies (4) Good night (1658) Bad night (723) Order T-Shirt
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(516): View more from New York

my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing

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(516): my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing http://tfl.nu/sqvp

Replies (2) Good night (550) Bad night (1281) Order T-Shirt
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up

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(215): When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up http://tfl.nu/2k98

Replies (8) Good night (359) Bad night (1872) Order T-Shirt
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(313): View more from Michigan

Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on

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(313): Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on http://tfl.nu/edc7

Replies (11) Good night (946) Bad night (304) Order T-Shirt
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(516): View more from New York

There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?

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(516): There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much? http://tfl.nu/0m7u

Replies (3) Good night (515) Bad night (1065) Order T-Shirt
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(716): View more from New York

She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever

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(716): She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever http://tfl.nu/gnyf

Replies (8) Good night (1410) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt
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(503): View more from Oregon

Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.

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(503): Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in. http://tfl.nu/pa8o

Replies (7) Good night (1675) Bad night (473) Order T-Shirt
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.

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(814): Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds. http://tfl.nu/uh0q

Replies (2) Good night (365) Bad night (1002) Order T-Shirt

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