If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
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he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
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Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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