got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize