he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize